Inquisition by a 4 year old

When I wrote this post about my 3 year old niece, I knew I needed to share this story about her older sister. This took place 4 years ago when my niece was 4. I was watching her at my house for a bit while my sister did some things that are easier done without a 4 year old in tow. In a short time after she arrived, she had already posed the following questions to me in fairly rapid succession:

- "Why don't you live with anybody?"

- "Why don't you have any carpet in your house?" (my main floor is a mix of laminate, hardwood, and tile)

- "Why don't you have a car seat?" (I couldn't drive anywhere with her while she was here because I didn't have one.)

As you can see, there was a lot going on in her little head.

In case you are curious, here were my responses:

- "Because I like living by myself"

- "Because I don't like carpet that much"

- "Because I don't have any kids" to which she promptly responded "I stay here sometimes."

I love watching my nieces' and nephews' brains at work, even if they do sometimes make me feel like I am at an inquisition.

 

Love is comfortable

 The 13th of 1st Corinthians lists some of love's many qualities. It is sometimes known as the "Love Chapter" and is often quoted at weddings. Jennifer Lopez even referenced part of it after she married Ben Affleck. Here is the NIV Version:

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

Love is definitely all these things. It is also, of course, much more. One of those is comfortable. This was illustrated to me on 2 different occasions by my 3 year old niece. Last month, a group of us were attending her older sister's swim meet. In between events, we were sitting and talking. I looked over, and my niece was sprawled in her grandfather's lap, as relaxed as if she were on the couch at home watching her favorite tv show. A couple of weeks later, another group of us went out to dinner. After everyone was finished eating, my niece migrated to a table with my sister and her husband (aka my niece's aunt and uncle). My sister was holding my niece's sister, and my niece made herself at home while my brother-in-law held her. Again, she was completely kicked back, just as comfortable as she could be.

Both of these occasions made my heart happy. I knew that my niece was completely comfortable because she knew she was loved, safe, and cherished. Would she tell you that's why she was so relaxed? No. First, she's 3. Second, I think it's something intuitive for her and the rest of us. We don't consciously think "I can relax around this person because s/he loves me, is protective of me, and values me for who I am." We just know that we are comfortable. Being in this situation is a great gift and very precious. I am so blessed to have witnessed it in action. 

The dreading is worse than the doing

Several of the blinds in my house have needed replaced since I moved in 4 years ago. Most of the issues were pretty minor, with small pieces of blinds missing. I did have one that completely broke a while back. It was in a guest bedroom, and there are also curtains in the room, so I just took it down and never replaced it. Recently the blind in bathroom has seemed determined to force the issue. It has been losing pieces with increasing frequency. Replacing all missing and broken blinds was placed on my goal list for 2023.

I started by measuring all the windows. They are all the same size, so that made shopping easy. I started doing some online research, and fairly quickly I discovered this is a standard window size, so blinds were readily and cheaply available. I placed an order, and they were shipped to my house at no charge.

Once the blinds arrived, it was time for installation. I was thrilled to find that 2 of the blinds that needed replaced used the exact same hardware as the replacements. I simply removed the old ones and put in the new ones. The others required removing the old mounting brackets (very easy) and installing the new. The first one took me a few minutes to figure out, and then the rest were identical so I was able to do them with little fuss. The end result: I am thrilled. The blinds look great. This project was an example of the dreading being worse than the doing. Had I known how little time, effort, and money it would take, I would have tackled this project long ago. Below are before and after pictures of the bathroom blind that forced this project. I think you'll agree it was past time to replace it blind, and the end result was a definite improvement.

The Right Tool Makes All the Difference

 Have you ever struggled to accomplish something, then it almost miraculously becomes easy when you have the proper tools? It could be a literal tool, a piece of software, access to data you need, instructions on how to do the task, or anything else that is renders the job much simpler to do. I experienced this myself recently.

Last year as part of a larger project I replaced the brass door hinges in my house with oiled bronze ones for an updated look. At that time my plan was to add hinge pin door stops when I installed the new hinges. For reasons unknown to me, there was not a single door stop in this house when I bought it. Hinge pin door stops are easy to install. You remove the hinge pin, put the hinge pin stop on top, then reinsert the pin. Easy peasy. 

Part of my house is an addition with a different style of hinges, so I had to purchase two different brands. One brand of hinges worked just like I described above. The pins were easily removed with a hammer and screwdriver. The pins on the other brand seem to have been inserted with superglue. After trying to remove several of them unsuccessfully, I knew I need to stop because I was soon going to damage one or more of the following:

• the door
• the door frame 
• the hinge
• the hinge pin
• my hand 

I looked at the online reviews of the hinges that were giving me fits, and sure enough, I was not alone in having difficulty removing the pins. I did some internet research to find a better way to free the pins. I found out there are actually hinge pin remover tools. They were cheap (under $10) and had good reviews, so I thought it was worth a shot. I bought one of these yesterday at Home Depot. I gave it a try today. OH MY GOODNESS. Worth every single penny and then some. The tool was very simple to use. The pins came out with just a few hammer taps, and there was no damage to any objects either inanimate or human. I had my remaining 7 hinge pins installed in no time. It is amazing the difference the right tool makes.

Perhaps the two are related?

During an interview today, one of the questions we asked was "What about your coworkers bothers you the most?" This candidate is currently is a supervisor at his employer. His response: "The supervisors watch Disney movies all day and complain their employees aren't properly trained". 

Dear supervisors at this employer: Perhaps if, instead of watching Disney movies during the workday, you took the time to train your staff, aka, do your job, the situation would improve?

The industry you ask? Local government. Thankfully I don't live in this location, so at least it isn't my tax dollars being squandered.

Dear Employer: You deserve this and more

 You may have seen the headline around the internet: Kentucky man sues employer for throwing him birthday party, and now they owe him $450K. I have seen it referenced on LinkedIn, Yahoo, TMZ, and even BBC. From the headline, it sounds ridiculous. Once you review the facts, though, the employer deserved this and more.

In summary:

- Employee asks employer not to throw him a birthday party as it could cause him to have a panic attack

- Employer throws him a party anyway. Employee has a panic attack. (Hmm, just like he told you he would...)

- The employee is berated the next day for his reaction to the party (really?) which causes, you guessed it, another panic attack

- Employer sends the employee home and fires him shortly thereafter

- Employee sues (I would have too)

Here is a breakdown of the legal aspects of the case. One of the comments I read on LinkedIn said that employers mistakenly think they can fire employees for any reason because Kentucky, like 48 other states, is an at will employment state. To quote one of the lawyers we used at a previous job "employment at will means you can fire someone for any reason or no reason at all as long as it's not an illegal reason." (emphasis added). In the case, the jury decided it was an illegal reason and awarded damages accordingly.

As I told one of my HR coworkers, this situation could have been avoided if the staff of the employer had just been decent people. Someone tells you he doesn't want a birthday party? Then don't throw him one. This is not rocket science. I have said before that 90% of HR is common sense. I definitely think this qualifies.

Finally, this is costing the employer far more than $450,000 (note- they likely have insurance that will pay at least part of this). First, they have had to pay for attorneys to litigate this case. As someone who used to review legal bills in a previous job, I can assure you lawyers aren't cheap, and this case must have had tons of billable hours. Secondly, this is absolutely horrible PR. Would you want to work for this company? I wouldn't, unless they paid me tons of money to help fix their obviously broken corporate culture. In my book, they deserve every bit of what this is costing them financially and reputationally. 

I-bonds just got even more interesting

 Last fall I wrote about I-bonds. Today, it was announced that the rate for the upcoming 6 months will be 9.62%! Yes, nearly 10%. This will be a record. The financial nerd set, self-included, is practically salivating. As I told my mom previously, some of the people on one of the financial boards I follow have serious bucks. There are people that buy the $45K annual limit of I-bonds each year ($10K for each spouse, $10K for each spouse's trust, and overpay their federal taxes enough to get $5K in paper bonds from their tax return). Though I'm not in their league at this point of my life, I do like reading their posts as I learn a lot. 

I'll repeat my disclaimer from the last time I wrote about I-bonds: I am not a financial advisor, nor do I play one on TV. This article is not a suggestion for you to buy anything. It is my thoughts on something interesting to me. If you'd like to learn more, do your own independent research from reputable sources.