Strip club sues competitor over negative claim about its girls

Let's face it, with a title like that, you have to read this article. Since beauty is subjective, I'd say this will be a hard one to win. But man, how funny.

How to speak HR

Want to test your skills at translating HR speak into plain English? Read this article and try to process it as someone in HR would.

What did you come up with? The dude was canned, or more accurately, he was given the opportunity to resign BEFORE they canned him. Did you get that?

Below are the things that give it away to an HR person and why: 

"He submitted his resignation Monday and Friday will be his last day at One Southern Indiana"
Two weeks' notice is minimum for any job. A month or more for this position wouldn't be unusual.

"Dale Gettelfinger, secretary of the One Southern Indiana Board, said he was surprised to learn about Wassmer’s resignation at a regular board meeting Thursday morning."
If this was a normal resignation, there'd be no reason you wouldn't pass it on as soon as it happened, i.e. he probably didn't actually resign Monday. That's just the cover story.

"Wassmer’s departure was handled by a small group of board members, including board chairman Vaughan Scott, and other board members were told only that the CEO is leaving for personal reasons, Gettelfinger said."
If it's a normal resignation, there's no need to "handle" it. You just pass along the info. If all you tell people, especially board members,  is "personal reasons", this is damage control for sure.

"Scott said the resignation has nothing to do with a lawsuit filed against the Owensboro Chamber of Commerce, which Wassmer led before being hired in Indiana on Oct. 31."
Say it with me, "Riigghhtt"

"The lawsuit has been dismissed but was widely reported."
They settled the matter out of court with a nondisclosure clause. Happens all the time.

"Wassmer said he doesn’t have a job in Owensboro but has some ideas to pursue. "
You supposedly gave 4 days notice AND you don't have a job? Yep, you got axed.



Here's some more information on the original lawsuit. I love how he says the fact that the lawsuit was filed on Monday and he resigned on Tuesday aren't related. A lady at work said he took the trip with his girlfriend and his wife divorced him shortly thereafter. Go figure.

Hope you enjoyed today's game of "How to speak HR".

Deal of the Week

This week Rite Aid has certain varieties of Colgate toothpaste on sale for $3.50 when you use your wellness+ card (sign up is free). For each one you purchase up to 4, a $3.50 coupon good for your next purchase is printed for you at checkout. But it gets better. I also had 2 $0.75 coupons from the Sunday paper. I'm still not done. About a month ago Colgate Palmolive had a mail in rebate offer in the Sunday paper- purchase $10 worth of participating items on 1 receipt and get $5 back. I'd cut it out just in case. Good thing. When you add up the value of the product, my coupons, and rebate then subtract my expenses of sales tax, a stamp, and perhaps $0.10 for an envelope, they are paying me very close to $5 and giving me $14 worth of toothpaste. That's what I call a deal.

P.S. You might be thinking "There's no way I'll use that much toothpaste before it expires". Donate it. There are nonprofits that would love to have what you don't need. You make money and do good at the same time. It's a definite win-win.

Homemade Mango Sorbet Anyone?

I recently ran across this recipe on Panera's website. I LOVE mango, so I printed it out for my "to try" file. Then, two weeks ago Saturday I found a 2 pound package of pre-peeled and sliced mangoes at Sam's Club. The price was right, so I scooped them up. First, I made a mango coconut shrimp recipe that I love. On Sunday, I made the sorbet, with two minor modifications. First, no bananas as I don't like them. My mom said just to use another cup of mango. Second, I replaced the sugar with Splenda. No problems with either substitution. I didn't use the cookies either, but I really don't consider that part of the recipe. It was easy and tastes great! Here's what it looked like served up. If you like mangoes, I'd highly recommend it.

The Most Precious Resource

If I asked you what the most precious resource is in the entire world, what would you say? Perhaps you'd answer gold ($1722.93/oz as I write this). Maybe you'd say platinum ($1633/oz currently). Or possibly you'd go the gemstone route and say rubies (more rare and thus valuable than diamonds. Blame the cartels for what you pay for the latter). I'd say the answer is none of these. It is TIME.

But wait, you say, I only make $8/hour. How is my time more valuable than anything you've listed above. It's simple. You can't get time back and you can't buy more. We all get the same number of hours in a day, whether we are megarich like Warren Buffett or just an average joe. It's a level playing field in that regard.

I absolutely detest people who waste my time. It is very valuable, and those who squander it incur my wrath. We should treat others' time the very same way. I get very upset when we make people wait after their scheduled interview times for no good reason. It's so disrespectful, and if I were the candidate it wouldn't enamor me of us.

Time is a precious, precious resource. Invest yours wisely, and be mindful of how you treat other people's.

Sowing and reaping is exponential

Perhaps you are familiar with the concept of sowing and reaping. Essentially, as you sow, so will you reap. It's often referred to in financial terms, but it also applies to things like kindness, friendship, etc. It also applies equally to negative things such as lies. One of the key things is to remember is that the process is not a one-to-one ratio.

I remember years ago my aunt illustrating this to a group of people. She had counted all the seeds from 1 watermelon (which obviously grew from a single seed). I wish I remembered the count, but suffice to say it was a lot. Far from a one-to-one ratio, it's not even multiplacative. It's exponential. Now, if it's been a while since math class or if math has never been your thing, let me use an example to show the difference.

Let's say someone offered you two choices, no strings attached. You could have $10 X 10 or $10 to the 10th power (sorry, I don't know how to input exponents in the text). Which would you choose? Free money is good, and so I'd want the bigger one. The first choice means you'd get $100. Not too shabby. However, the 2nd yields $10,000,000,000 ($10 billion). Yep, I want THAT one.

This is something we'd all do well to remember as we go about our lives. We would do much better to sow good things into the lives of others. It's both the right thing to do and in our own best interest as well.

Insult to Injury

How was your Valentine's day? I hope you had a great one. If it wasn't all you could have hoped for, let me assure you it could have been worse. Envision yourself in the following scenario:

First, several months ago your spouse one day says she no longer wants to be married. Now, imagine the same not-soon-enough-to-be-ex-spouse shows up to return the rest of your belongings to you. At work. On Valentine's Day. Yes, it really happened to someone I know.

Does anyone know if you can expedite divorce proceedings?