How to speak HR

Want to test your skills at translating HR speak into plain English? Read this article and try to process it as someone in HR would.

What did you come up with? The dude was canned, or more accurately, he was given the opportunity to resign BEFORE they canned him. Did you get that?

Below are the things that give it away to an HR person and why: 

"He submitted his resignation Monday and Friday will be his last day at One Southern Indiana"
Two weeks' notice is minimum for any job. A month or more for this position wouldn't be unusual.

"Dale Gettelfinger, secretary of the One Southern Indiana Board, said he was surprised to learn about Wassmer’s resignation at a regular board meeting Thursday morning."
If this was a normal resignation, there'd be no reason you wouldn't pass it on as soon as it happened, i.e. he probably didn't actually resign Monday. That's just the cover story.

"Wassmer’s departure was handled by a small group of board members, including board chairman Vaughan Scott, and other board members were told only that the CEO is leaving for personal reasons, Gettelfinger said."
If it's a normal resignation, there's no need to "handle" it. You just pass along the info. If all you tell people, especially board members,  is "personal reasons", this is damage control for sure.

"Scott said the resignation has nothing to do with a lawsuit filed against the Owensboro Chamber of Commerce, which Wassmer led before being hired in Indiana on Oct. 31."
Say it with me, "Riigghhtt"

"The lawsuit has been dismissed but was widely reported."
They settled the matter out of court with a nondisclosure clause. Happens all the time.

"Wassmer said he doesn’t have a job in Owensboro but has some ideas to pursue. "
You supposedly gave 4 days notice AND you don't have a job? Yep, you got axed.



Here's some more information on the original lawsuit. I love how he says the fact that the lawsuit was filed on Monday and he resigned on Tuesday aren't related. A lady at work said he took the trip with his girlfriend and his wife divorced him shortly thereafter. Go figure.

Hope you enjoyed today's game of "How to speak HR".