Be careful whom you text

Be careful whom you text, especially when plotting illegal activity.

Ambiguity at work

I was having a discussion with someone about ambiguity in the workplace. When she described what she faces, I loved it and asked for permission to share it. Permission was granted, so without further ado:

"It's like working with the circus clowns who keep going in one car door and out the other while asking you to keep on driving."  

When 1/4" is all the stands between you and employment

Last week I made calls to check in with several of my customers at work. Part of my job is to see how their job search is going, are there services our office can offer to help, etc. One of the people with whom I spoke is Mr. X. He has been unemployed for over 6 months. He lost his long term job due to failing a post-accident drug test. Oops. However, because his employer didn't universally drug test everyone who was injured, he was able to draw unemployment. He exhausted the full amount (26 weeks) a bit ago. Overall, he's a nice guy who didn't make wise choices and is now paying the price.

He has been diligently job searching, and he has been frustrated that for the first time in his life, it's not been a quick process. We've paid him to be retrained in what is a very marketable skill locally. Due to issues with his driving record, it has taken him longer than normal to get a job in that field. Finally, though, it's starting to pay off. He had one offer, but he failed the agility test. He had a confirmed offer for a job that would require a ton of travel, not his preferred, but you do what you have to do. While waiting for that job to start, he found what seems like will be a great match of his previous employment and his new training. It is a local job too. He's passed the urine drug test, and now just one thing is separating him from gainful employment- 1/4" of hair. Yes, you read that right. His new employer does both urine and hair drug test. For the latter, you must have at least 1/2" of hair. Right now, his is only 1/4". So hopefully in another 2 weeks or so, he can test and start work. Thankfully, the potential employer is cool with that. It's not often that 1/4" is all that stands between you and a job.

It's obvious you're not a parent when...

You call your sister (mother of two) and pose the following question "What's the pony with the rainbow on its butt?"

Context: I was doing some Christmas shopping, and I needed to identify the specific My Little Pony featured on an object. She verified the color of said pony and told me its name.

Disconnected from reality

One of the things we often notice in our customers is their lack of connection with how the real work works. A recent example: One of our customers was fired from his temporary job because he shipped items on the wrong truck. This cost the company $1900. He couldn't believe that they fired him for this. He was even more incredulous that they did so right before Christmas. He told one of the bosses "You should have fired me after Christmas." WHAT? You made an expensive mistake as a temporary employee. One of the perks of hiring temporary employees from the company standpoint is you can get rid of them no muss, no fuss. And why on earth would they keep you on just because it's December? When you need to go, you need to go. As we say amongst the staff- our customers aren't divorced from reality. They're not even acquainted with it.

How to lose your job in HR

This week we got some scoop on why the HR person for the building from whom we rent space was fired. One of the staff was telling us that they were working on replacing her. Being me I asked "So why did she get fired?" His response "Let me put it this way. It's easy to get fired if you don't file for 2 years." It seems nothing in that time frame had made it into employees' files. Instead she had huge stacks of paper in her office. Nice system huh? Apparently one of the big wigs found out that's why they'd been unable to find things they needed, and out she went.

Having done a ton of HR filing in my day, I know it's not glamorous. But it is necessary if you want to have an organized HR department and if you wish to remain employed yourself.

Salted Nutella Cookie Bars

When I ran across this recipe online, I knew I had to try it.

Here is my finished product.

Everyone who tried them loved them. They were easy to make as well. They would make a wonderful addition to a holiday party dessert table. Yum yum.

Control is important from an early age

Yesterday I was watching my 2 year old nephew while he played outside at our annual family Thanksgiving. He had a delightful time throwing rocks, sticks, and leaves into the pond from a small bridge above. Every once in a while, he would ask me "Go inside?". I would respond "We can go inside whenever you want". He would then go back to playing. He didn't want to go inside yet. He wanted to make sure that we would go when he was ready.

I was reminded of a very similar incident I had with his older sister when she was about the same age. I had taken her to play at the park on the way home from my mom's house. From time to time she would say "I want to go home." I would I say "Ok", and we would start walking toward my car. She would then say she wanted to play more, and we'd turn back around.

I believe my role as an aunt is to help my nieces and nephew grow to be strong, healthy, independent people. I cherish opportunities like these to show them that their views matter and that I am there to support them in any way I can. Small moments can have a big impact in shaping who we are.

Only in Government- Update #2

The internet in our office was messed up for nearly a month. Often times we got the "cannot display page" error, and when we didn't get that, it was super slow. They finally got that fixed, and now our phones and faxed are messed up again. We can't fax at all, and our phones work about half the time. The rest of the time, when we try to make or receive calls, there is nothing but dead air. It is a building-wide problem, and it supposedly lies at the feet of the internet provider. Anyone thinking this will be resolved quickly? Anyone?

Workplace Drama is Everywhere-Update

Organization X now has another ring in its circus. We found out last week that the HR person's suspension has become a termination.

You know your company is short staffed when...

My coworker's husband works for a local company that has a branch located 2 hours away. That location is a small warehouse with only 5 employees. They currently have 2 people on vacation, 2 sick, and the 5th out due to injury. So what are they going to do?  They are closing the office today and tomorrow. Yesterday my customer's husband drove up and staffed it. Did I mention he's the IT guy? He was pulling orders and loading delivery trucks with a forklift. That is a definite sign that your company is short staffed.

Perspective is an amazing thing

I was not looking forward to returning to work Tuesday after my recent vacation. Who does? But that all changed after I talked to a friend who still works at my former employer. After she gave me the scoop on several recent developments there, I practically skipped off to work Tuesday morning. I was so relieved to not be going back to something like that. It's amazing how perspective can influence one's attitude.

Workplace Drama is Everywhere

My company rents office space from Organization X. Their Executive Director got fired a couple weeks ago, their HR person got suspended yesterday, and they had no finance person at all for several weeks which lead to a major problem with their payroll. It's is definitely dysfunctional, but it's sure fun being on the outside looking in. In my last job I worked in HR, and I got to see all this up close and personal whether I wanted to or not. 

I have come to the conclusion that like families, every work environment is dysfunctional in some form or fashion. Organization X just seems to be especially blessed in this department.

This person was teaching your children- update

Yet another scary story from the person who was recently teaching someone's children.

This week she asked for a phone book so she could look up information on a company where she had applied for work. A few minutes later she said "Hobby Lobby isn't in this phone book.". She handed the book back to me. It was opened to the "Dental" section in the yellow pages! I immediately flipped to the "H" section of the white pages, found it, and gave it back to her. Be afraid, be very afraid.

Why you have to pay attention to your bills

The promotional pricing on my home phone and internet expired last month, so I called and made some changes. I did a one year service agreement and downgraded my internet speed in return for a reduced bill. Imagine my surprise when I opened my bill the next time, and the amount was higher than I was quoted. I saw that I was still being billed for the faster internet speed that I no longer received. When I called customer service, they came to same the conclusion. They have no idea how this happened, and I was on hold for some time while they unsuccessfully tried to deduce how that was possible. I received a free month of internet without even having to ask. 

This is yet another illustration of why you must pay attention to your bills, not blindly pay them. If I hadn't, I would have overpaid every month. Take the time each month to really look at your bills. You may be surprised by what you find.

Only in government- update

They finally got our inbound calls working again Tuesday. Took just a tad under 3 weeks. 

But wait, it gets better. My computer at work had to be reimaged last week due to a virus. It then took a week for someone to restore my e-mail access (long story). When they go it up and running today, I found out that when it was originally configured, it was set up so that all the messages were stored on my computer, not backed up on the server. I have lost every single message I've ever sent or received. I miss the technology from my private sector job. 

Only in government

Further proof that I no longer have a real job

Two weeks ago today I looked down and noticed that our phones weren't working. We lease space from an area nonprofit, so I gave the appropriate building contact a call. He said "I bet you're calling because you're phones I down. I unplugged them. We are going to sell that system. I'll plug them back in".

Some back story: a year ago the building installed a new phone system without any contact with us. We've been able to make outbound calls with it since then, but our inbound calls have continued to be received via the old system. We've talked to building management and the appropriate person in our organization (who works in another city) about this issue on multiple occasions, but it's never been resolved.

Well, apparently the old system is now down for the count. For the last two weeks, we have been unable to receive calls made to our office phone number. The only way to contact us is to call the building and then either be transferred or to punch in our extension. We do not have direct dials to our desk. Of course, essentially no one knows how to do this as all we ever give out is the office number (being me, I had provided the other method to my friends and family right after I started a year ago). The crazy thing is, our management, working out of another office, doesn't seem to be too concerned. Can you imagine if this happened at a real business? People would be fired, there would be talks of leases being broken, etc. Not when you're government. We, the employees, have naturally greatly enjoyed not receiving calls from the general public.

But wait, it gets better. One day last week we couldn't make any outbound calls either. We also found out that when you called the building it said "You have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service." We immediately reported the issue, and it was fixed in an hour or two. The problem? The building hadn't paid its phone bill in 3 months! The maintenance person was on medical leave, their finance person quit/got fired, etc. It's a very interesting place.

This person was teaching your children

Along the lines of "every day is a new day", but more scary:

Monday a customer came into the office and asked our receptionist "Is my card here?" After several minutes, we determined that she was looking for the debit card our state uses for unemployment payments. We explained to her that this card will be mailed to her home after her first unemployment payment is posted. This is almost verbatim the conversation we had with her last Monday. When we were talking about this at work the next morning, my coworker said she had a very similar conversation with the customer when she filed for unemployment several weeks ago. 

What makes this story even more frightening is the person's occupation. She was a teacher. <shudder>. I told my coworkers "Hopefully she's an absent-minded professor type who's really good at what she does, but stinks at real life." I doubt that's the case though.

Some people just aren't very bright

One of the first things I noticed when my new upstairs neighbor (UN) moved in not too long ago was that he smoked. This was an immediate concern to me since I am highly allergic to smoke, and if you've ever lived in an apartment you know that it will come through the walls, ventilation, etc. I mentioned this to the landlord's son (LLS) who lives in the building and is a part owner. He assured me it would be fine since the lease states no smoking is allowed in the apartment. I was relieved.

Fast forward a week or two after that. I was talking to LLS again who said "We may have to get rid of old boy upstairs." When I asked why he said "I knocked on his door, and when he answered, he was smoking in the apartment." Oopsie. Not long after that I came home one day, and my apartment smelled like smoke. Being me, I marched myself up the stairs and knocked on UN's door. I acted ignorant and said "My apartment smells like smoke. I'm trying to figure out where it's coming from. Has someone been smoking in your apartment?" He said "I smoke in my apartment." I was so dumbfounded that he admitted to it that I all I could say was "So that's where it's coming from". 

I immediately went back to my apartment and called my landlord (LL). He said he would talk to UN. He called me back shortly and said their conversation went like this:

UN "It's my apartment. I'll do whatever I want".

LL "You are violating your lease"

UN "Evict me"

LL "I will"

The next morning LL filed eviction paperwork. He called UN and left him a message advising this had been done. UN called back a couple of hours later and said "I'll be smoking outside from now on." LL then withdrew the eviction paperwork. As my mom had suggested, it seems UN was trying to call LL's bluff. I told my LL this, and he said "I've done this for too long to be bluffing".  

I was not happy that the LL didn't go through with the eviction, and neither was LLS. When I spoke to him, he said he wanted UN out because of the smoking, being late with his rent (he'd only been there a month or two!), and moving in his girlfriend without putting her on the lease. Wow, great tenant here.

Fast forward to this month. I talked to my LL, and he said UN is being evicted. This was on the 10th. I asked why and he said UN had not paid his September rent. My check had cleared my bank on 8/28! Apparently UN told LL that he was trying to get custody of his son, and his rent money was going to his lawyer. I told LL "That's going to be great for the custody hearing when he has nowhere to live." The eviction paperwork was filed on 9/17, and as far as I know UN has been served with the appropriate paperwork. He is supposed to be out a couple weeks after that. LL is going to garnish his wages for $1500-$2000 to cover cleaning (getting the smoke smell out of the brand new carpet!), lost rent, etc. 

The moral of the story: Some people just aren't very bright. If you know you want to smoke in your residence, don't sign anything saying you won't. Pay your rent when it's due, or expect to be homeless. It's not rocket science.

Living in the land of low expectations

At a recent job interview I was asked about my computer proficiency. One of the programs I mentioned was Excel. A member of the interview team then asked me "So you could create a new spreadsheet?". I probably gaped at her before replaying "Oh yes, I can do graphs, etc. I use Excel to do my budget at home."  

Creating a new spreadsheet is not proficiency at Excel. It is one of the most basic things you can do. I immediately gathered that if I got the job, I would be living in the land of low expectations. That's not necessarily a bad thing.

 

Weirdest Thing You've Ever Seen at Work

Askamanger.com recently asked people to submit their weirdest stories from work. The list is impressive. It may even make your job look calm by comparison.

Things for which college does not prepare you

Sometimes you run into situations for which no amount of education prepares you. A couple weeks ago I was working with a customer. She was seated, and I was standing behind her helping her navigate a website. I looked down, and something about her hair looked funny. After a few moments, I finally figured out what was going on- her weave was coming out! Oh my. I wasn't sure what to do. If I noticed it, someone doing an interview would as well. I didn't know what the etiquette was for an instance  such as this. After my customer left, I did what I always do in such a situation- I requested a consult. I e-mailed a former coworker for advice. Here is her response:

I’m not sure how you can casually mention, “your weave is coming out”. I guess it would depend on the person and their “attitude”.

Personally, I would want to know, but some “chicks” may not appreciate it. I guess if you feel that she would be receptive and NOT offended, then yes, please mention it as tactfully as possible.

That was my thought process as well, but it was nice to have independent confirmation of my idea. As I told someone, there are some things that college doesn't teach you.

How my mind works

When I got home from work on Friday, this was sitting on my front steps.

What most people would think
1. Wow, those are so pretty.
2. I wonder what sweet person sent them to me?

How my mind works
1. Those things are hideous.
- I hate the color pink
2. Great. What kind of stalker do I have?

The flowers had no card, so I still have no idea from whence they came. I thought maybe I could stand to have them in my house, but I couldn't. I gave them to my Mormon missionary neighbors who were thrilled to rehome them. Three different people to whom I've told this story have said the same thing "This person obviously doesn't know you very well." My hatred for pink is well known. One person even told me she was thinking the stalker thing before I mentioned that part. Great mind think alike. ;)

I get why Twitter millionaire cut momma off

Last week a customer came in the office looking for work. We discussed her job history and future goals. It was determined that due to the medical restrictions she has, a partner organization with whom we work would be the best place for her to seek services. She mentioned during the course of our conversation that she had been unemployed for several months after leaving her last job due to medical reasons. She said her son had been sending her money each month, but he told her that after August he would not be doing so any more.

As she was leaving my workspace, she said her son lives in California and works at Twitter. After Twitter stock went public, he is now a millionaire. She said her friends and family have been saying things like "if I were a millionaire I'd take care of my mom", etc. Obviously she's been telling all her friends and family her business. I have a different take. I understand exactly why he cut her off. She is capable of working, but she wasn't looking as long as he supported her. Now that he's stopped, she's earnestly seeking employment. Funny how that works. Suze Orman always says that you have to examine whether your generosity is benefiting someone in the long term. As she succinctly puts it "Are you helping or are you hurting?" 

How to make your boss's head explode

Monday I was talking to the Executive Director of the building in which my employer is housed. He had "that look". It means his head is about to explode. When he told me the story, I understood. I think you will too.

On Monday he asked one of his employees where she was Friday afternoon. No one had been able to find her. Her response: "I've asked for a raise, and you didn't give me one. Daycare is expensive. I'm now working 9-3." Yep, that's what she told him. She has, on her own, reduced her hours by 1/4 while drawing the same pay. It's a sweet gig if you can make it work. However, I don't think it's going to work for her. I'll give her this- that took some guts (and stupidity).

Lies people tell

I have come to the conclusion that lies are epidemic in our society. I also think that people don't understand that they aren't fooling people as much as they think they are. Two work examples from last week.

Example 1
My organization is having a steps challenge this month. They have a website where you can enter your steps each day. We got an e-mail stating that as many as 9 million steps had been recorded by one person. The e-mail went on to say that it would have required averaging 187 steps/hour for 24 hours/day to achieve this. Oopsie. The e-mail requested everyone to review their numbers and stated that anyone whose numbers that were not possible would be removed from the competition.

Example 2
My coworker was meeting with an unemployed customer who had been assigned to work with her in order to continue receiving unemployment. The customer told my coworker several lies during the short meeting, but the most whopping was this one. She said it cost her $25 in gas to get to the meeting. This person lives near where I live, or about 11 miles from the office. I immediately divided this dollar amount by the price of gas/gallon, then utilized this data to calculate what mpg she would have been getting had this been true. The answer? 1.8 miles per gallon. Um, no. She stated she was driving her husband's truck. I know that large pick ups are gas hogs, getting as little as 10-12 mpg. Even at that, it would have been 1 gallon to get to our office, or around $3.70. Math, my friend and the enemy of liars.

Every day is a new day- update

I have happy news about one of the people mentioned in my last posting. The guy who still needed help after weeks of filing unemployment? Well, I am very pleased to report that for the last two weeks he has been able to file his claim without any staff assistance. It's amazing what we can learn when we have to isn't it?

Every day is a new day

I have determined that for some of our customers, every day is a new day. I don't mean this in a good way either. No matter how many times we show them how to do something (download/upload a resume, sign in to one of our systems, etc.), the next time they come in it's like they've never done it before. Perfect example- we have a customer who has been drawing unemployment for two or three months now. He still has issues filing his claim every week. It is a simple system, and it's the same every week. Our policy is we offer help less readily each time you do a process as the goal is for customers to learn to do it themselves. I want to tell people so badly "Didn't you pay attention the last 10 times we've shown you?" and "write it down if you can't remember." I can't fathom living my life where I pay no attention to what I'm doing and never have any retained knowledge from what I've done previously.

I'm not surprised you're unemployed...

One of the unfortunate things about my job is customers often mistakenly assume that I want to hear or care about why they are unemployed or their life story. I don't. What I want to tell many of them after they end their monologue is "I'm not surprised you're unemployed. I'm surprised you were ever employed."

I'm thankful I'm not where I once was

This afternoon about 4 I was at work feeling more bored than usual. I was thinking about how badly I want to get a job where I am challenged again. My mini pity party was swiftly ended after I got home from work. A former coworker called me, and she told me how horribly she is being treated at my former employer. She feels that they are out to get her, and I believe she is right. While I was there I saw people targeted for no real reason, and it appears this is happening to her. I felt so badly for her, and it reminded yet again of one of the many reasons I left. When I compare my job situation now to this time last year, it is night and day. It really put things in perspective for me. If being bored is my biggest problem at my current job, then life is pretty good. I'm so thankful I am not where I once was.

People different from you part #3

I have written before about how we often "know" that not everyone is like us, but that it can still come as a shock when we are confronted with evidence of this. Here are two recent examples.

Example 1- The Amusement Park

We were talking about a local amusement park, and one of my coworkers said there is no way physically that she could spend all day doing that. She is younger than I am. I wanted to tell her that my mom has no problem spending all day riding rides, walking all over the park, etc. I was a bit slack jawed.

Example 2- The Drive Thru

A local radio station promotes a "drive thru difference" every couple of months. On the designated day you are encouraged to pay for the order behind you in the drive through line. I like the concept, but I don't do fast food much, and when I do, I go inside. The last time I went through a drive thru was in August of last year while I was on vacation. On a related note, we are talking about fast food at work recently, and I said how the food from Chain X is overall not good. My coworker stated that yes, it was. I wanted to ask her "Do you know what good food is?"

This should not come as surprise

A customer came into our office seeking assistance accessing and editing his resume that is stored on our site. As I was helping him, I asked what he needed to change. He showed me. He said "Can you believe that one time I didn't get a job because I misspelled tablet?" (The resume read "table"). He seemed shocked by that. I told him I was not surprised at all. I shared that at my last job we marked resumes with typos and those were normally not considered at all. I showed him how to use the spell check function in the program and pointed out several typos that I noticed on his resume at a cursory glance. 

When I told my coworker this story later, she said what really is shocking is that the company actually told him that this is why he wasn't hired. She's right. Normally the resume would just be tossed aside and the candidate would have no idea why. If you or someone you know is job hunting, I cannot overemphasize how important it is to have an typo free resume. If you have typos it implies that 

A. You can't write

B. You don't care enough to proof read

C. You didn't take the time to proof read

or 

D. All of the above

I had a saying at my last job "It's always an interview". Every interaction you have with the company can make or break your chance of getting the job. Proceed with great care.

Blessing in disguise

Recently I was almost to work when I realized I had failed to bring a plate for heating my lunch. This was a problem because my food was in a foil container which of course cannot be microwaved. I was not pleased at the prospect of no food. When I got to work I started digging through the cabinets for a paper plate, dish, etc. that I could use. Lo and behold, I not only found something, it was something of mine! For several weeks I had been missing the 4th plate to one of my sets of dishes. I could not for the life of me figure out where it could be as I never loaned it to anyone, and I only use the plates at home or work. Well, apparently I had brought it here one day and somehow left it. The only thing I can figure is I must have cleaned it, set it down, and never picked it back up. What started as a moment of frustration turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

You have not because you ask not #457

Two weeks ago I was talking with the director of the building in which our office is housed. He mentioned that someone from my organization was coming over to sign the new lease for our space. I asked if it would be possible to have weekly vacuuming service added as part of the lease. He seemed surprised that it wasn't already being done since the trash is picked up daily. He said there was no need to have it added, he would just ask someone to start doing it immediately. Sure enough, less than an hour later someone came and did it. Oh my. This just made my day. Before it was supposed to be done each week by our part time person. Let's say that in the 8 months since I started I can count on two hands the number of times I've seen it done. And I get that. It is very normal that if you rent space in an office building that the landlord provides basic cleaning services. Praise the Lord, we are there. Yet another example of "you have not because you ask not".

Run fast and far

If a potential employer exhibits anything from this list, run fast and far.

Things you should never do when you're looking for work

It is sad that people have to be told these things, but amusing none the less.

The song in your heart

Music is a powerful thing. It can speak to us on an emotional level like few other things. In a recent sermon our pastor talked about the song in your heart. This is something that has been in my thoughts as well. This time last year I was in a job in which certain members of management made my job less than pleasant. Before work in the morning I would listen to encouraging music to help me face the crazy that would be contained in my workday. Once I got a new job, there was lots celebratory music. Now that I've been in this job, my new theme song has been "Teach me, Lord, to wait". This job is super easy, and it has allowed for me to be refreshed. 

What is the song in your heart right now?

Setting yourself up to fail

Two weeks ago I had an interview for an HR position locally. For several reasons I determined it was not for me. One thing that was a definite flag to me was their attendance policy. This company was an independent entity until about 10 years ago when they were bought by a larger corporation. Some time after the purchase their sick time was taken away. Previously each employee received 5 sick days per year. If they didn't use them, they could sell them. Of course, the employees are still not happy about losing the days as they basically got nothing in return. They also have no personal time either. During the interview I asked the plant manager how they handle it when associates need time off for illness or other unforeseeable events. They can use their vacation time, but it counts as an occurrence. After 5 occurrences they receive disciplinary action. He was a nice guy, but he didn't really seem to get why this was a problem.

Hello, you are setting yourself up to fail. Life happens to us all. You or a family member gets sick, your car has a flat tire, etc. Since things like this will occur, you as a company need to make it easy on yourself and your staff by giving them an appropriate amount of time so that they can handle such things without occurrences. Your peeps are already mad, and justifiably so, over losing 5 paid days off/year. You then add insult to injury by adding occurrences to the mix. You will not be shocked to find out that for this reason and others, morale is in the toilet. I told them they need to rework this system. What I didn't tell them was they have set themselves up to fail.

Almond cookies- and a lesson on paying attention

Friday we had a family dinner at my grandparents' house. I determined one of the things I wanted to bring was almond cookies. I had a recipe off a bag of almonds that looked tasty, so I thought I'd give it a try. 

Wednesday night I mixed up the dough. I did think it was odd that there was so little flour in the mixture, but they scooped up quite nicely. As they baked, they smelled divine. When the timer went off, I opened the oven to find a science experiment gone awry. The cookies had run all over the pan, down the oven rack, to the bottom of the oven. Good times. I went back and looked at the recipe more closely. I thought it said 3/4 cup of flour when it actually should have been 3 1/4 cups. Yep, that will do it. I threw out all the remaining batter, scraped the goo off  the pans, and let them and the oven cool. Next I had to wash the cookie sheets, scrape the oven racks, and clean the bottom of the oven. It was not how I had planned to spend my evening, let me assure you. 

After all this I whipped up another batch of dough using the correct amount of ingredients and put it in the fridge. I baked it the next day, and as you can see they turned out just fine. They were also quite tasty.

The morale of the story: I should have paid closer attention. First I should have read the recipe itself closer. Secondly, I should have followed my own instincts. I've made enough cookies that I thought the amount of flour was really small. I should have trusted my gut and double checked the ingredient list. Had I done one or both of these, I'd have saved myself some serious time, effort, and frustration.

Sign that your coworker is done with her job

I was in our main office for training last week. I asked one of my coworkers there how she was doing. Her answer "I'm retiring next year." Yep, that was it. Not "fine how are you?" or "it's been crazy", just a pronouncement of her upcoming retirement. From her tone, I could tell it will arrive not soon enough. I later told her "You aren't going to miss us are you?" Her reply? "Bleep, no". Hehe. I think she's done.

How not to run your business

Customer satisfaction is a cornerstone of any good business. If your customers aren't happy, they won't come back, and they'll likely tell others about their unpleasant dealings with you. Based on a recent experience, I want to provide you with an example of how not to run your business.

Last month I decided it was probably finally done snowing, so it was time to wash my vehicles and get all the crud out from underneath them. This of course requires going to the car wash and purchasing the expensive package to get the undercarriage wash. Those of you familiar with my innate cheapness know this is painful to me, but I know it's a wise investment to prevent my car from rusting.

I went to the nearby car wash and paid my $9. Yes, it hurt. The first thing I noticed was that the undercarriage wash wasn't working. This was the entire reason I did this! Then, about halfway through the wash cycle, it stopped. I was not happy. I found the contact number posted at the car wash and call it as soon as I returned home. I left them a message explaining the situation and requested a refund. I would also have accepted a free wash if they'd have offered. I also called the phone number on the receipt several times. It just rang and rang. The next day I took both my cars to the other car wash in town. Not only was I able to clean my cars without issue, but this car wash is $1 cheaper.

I'll have you know that I never got a return call from the first car wash, and it's been nearly a month. I disputed the charge when my credit card statement arrived this month, and I've been credited for the full amount. Am I going to go back there and use their automatic car wash again? No. Am I going to recommend anyone else do so either? No. As one of my former coworkers used to say "If you're going to run your business, run your business."

You've led a sheltered life

My new coworker #1 asked coworker #2 and me if the refrigerator in the break room had an ice machine. I told her it did. Here’s how the rest of the conversation went:

CW#2 “Are you sure?”

Me “Yes, I’ve seen people use it.”

CW#2 “But there’s no dispenser”.

Me “It’s an old school ice maker inside the freezer. It makes the ice and dumps it into a plastic bin”

CW#2 “I’ve never seen one of those”

CW#2 is in her mid-20s.

U is for Unhelpful

We received this e-mail from our personnel department last week.

Fellow State Employees,Today, I am pleased to tell you about a new initiative to reward you for taking control of your health. In coming months, you will be hearing a lot about “Upgrade your health. Upgrade your plan.”
If you are currently enrolled in state medical benefits, you can qualify for the new Wellness Consumer Driven Health Plan (CDHP) by completing three easy steps before Aug. 31, 2014.

• Step One is completing the Well-Being Assessment (WBA) at MyHealthyLifestyles.com. This confidential assessment identifies health risks and creates an action plan.

• Step Two is completing a confidential biometric screening with your primary care physician or attending a free screening event in May, June or July.

• Step Three is logging at least 200,000 steps in the Healthy Lifestyles Steps Challenge in July or earning 2,500 points (in addition to WBA points) in MyHealthyLifestyles.com between June 1 and August 31.

Those who complete the three steps have the option of selecting the Wellness CDHP this fall during Open Enrollment.
Given the fast pace at which our lives move today, making healthier choices and being active are paramount to sustaining a vibrant Indiana. The State of Indiana is committed to giving employees the resources they need to take control of their health and well-being.
I encourage you to take a few minutes to learn more about upgrading your health by reading tomorrow’s issue of the Torch or by visiting www.investinyourhealthindiana.com/Upgrade.
Indiana is the front-runner in providing options to state employees that help you become more informed healthcare consumers. I look forward to completing these steps and participating alongside you in the Healthy Lifestyles Steps Challenge in July.

My first thought was “Sounds interesting. I wonder what the upgrade will be?” And I kept reading to find… I still had no idea. There was not one concrete example. I scoured the Personnel Department’s website. Still no data. I then sent them the following e-mail:

I read the e-mail about upgrading to the Wellness CDHP, but there was no information about the new plan itself, only how to qualify for it. I also looked on SPD's site and was unable to find any plan specifics. Can you please give me an overview of how the new plan will compare to current CDHPs offered by the state?

Thank you.

My coworker and I were talking about this, and she said “They’ll probably say more information will be coming soon.”

Sure enough, here’s the e-mail I got.

Thanks for your question. We are still finalizing the details on the upgrade, but more information will be coming soon. Our goal in providing this information today is to let plan holders know that they can qualify for the upgrade and give them plenty of time to complete the steps.Please let us know if you have any further questions. Thanks for your interest in the program!

My response:

Ok, I hope it is available very soon. It's difficult to decide if I should complete the qualification steps without this data. Thank you for the information

What I wanted to say:

What kind of crack are you on? This is why people HATE HR. You tell them they will have the option for a “new, improved” health plan, but you can’t provide any details on why they should even considered jumping through the hoops to get it.

I am not impressed. It looks like I need to go there and teach them a thing or two about how to run an HR department.

Yet another reason why my next job won't involve working with the general public

Last week a customer came into the office wanting to know when she could meet with me. She has been assigned to work with me due to her unemployment. Another office has already scheduled her first appointment with me. I asked her why she wanted to meet. She said she wanted to turn in her work search log (a requirement of unemployment) and talk about retraining. She then went on to tell me that her son has some type of medical issues, and she can only work certain hours. I could already tell this was not likely to be someone who’d be a good candidate for intensive services, so I told her we could meet when her appointment was scheduled in two weeks.

Friday I received her paperwork from our main office. Oh my. On it she says she is on a “leave of absence due to arrest” and her only available times to work are 4-11 AM due to her son’s school and medication schedules. Yes, even less likely to be a good candidate. Then my coworker looks the person up in our state’s online case system and finds out she has a pending Class D felony- battery causing bodily harm against someone under 14. Yikes. Beyond the awfulness of the alleged act itself, a pending felony is a huge barrier to employment. My other coworker stated we probably couldn’t even allow her in the building since she has a pending felony involving the harm a child. There is a daycare in our building, and that creates additional rules we have to follow. We contacted the head of the building in which we are located for clarification of the policy. He stated anyone who has been convicted of or has a pending felony involving children cannot come here and will have to work with our main office. I talked to a team leader and she stated she would contact the customer. Whew, that meant I wouldn’t have to have that oh-so-fun conversation. I did alert my coworker about the situation on the off chance the customer came into our office for service before our main office could contact her. Well, guess who shows up less than 15 minutes later? Yep, it was the customer in question. I took her out of the office into the hallway and explained the situation. I then escorted her out of the building, explaining that if the case resolves in her not receiving a felony that she is welcome back in our office. Thankfully she was calm and said she understood. Let’s say I more than earned my pay for today in the first 1.5 hours of the day.

Don't let your mouth write checks...

Recently I was reminded of a phrase I hadn't heard in a while. It starts out "don't let your mouth write checks" and I end it with "that your behind can't cash", though it more commonly ends stronger than that. A nearby city has been working on public project for what seems like forever. A neighboring municipality completed a similar project over a year ago. The key is though that city's project was funded by private donations, aka less hoops. The nearby city is only kicking in 20% of the cost while the state Department of Transportation (DOT) is paying 80%. If you've ever dealt with a state agency, you know that means lots of hoops. However, they are writing the check, so you have to play by their rules. The mayor of the city has recently been badmouthing the DOT because of all the delays. He stated he hopes to never work with them again. Now, I understand his frustration. This project has taken far longer than it should and has essentially turned into an ongoing comedy of errors. However, you don't honk off a state agency. Let me count the reasons why.

1. The current project is not done. After you've said bad things about them, how likely do you think they'll be to help finish this project as quickly and with as little hassle as possible to the city? Yep, not so much.

2. Even though you don't want to work with them again, it's very likely that you will want their help with something in the future. State government employees tend to stick around a long time. They will remember this when you come ask for something again. Don't expect them to be eager to help whatever project it is succeed.

3. You sound like a toddler throwing a tantrum. You didn't get your way and now you are mad. Suck it up! Life doesn't always go the way you plan. Part of being a functional grown-up is dealing with bumps in the road. You are the mayor. Act like one.

As soon as I read what the mayor said, I cringed with how it could end badly. Well, very soon I started reading other people saying this could be devastating to future projects where assistance from DOT was wanted. Yes, we should not let our mouths write checks our behinds can't cash.

Another example of "you have not because you ask not"

Last weekend my mom was telling me that she hadn't received her yearly invitation to a customer appreciation event that one of her vendors has held for years. She wondered if they'd stopped having it, stopped inviting her, etc. I told her to just ask them. She didn't want to appear too forward. I, Queen of Confrontation, told her there was no harm in asking. The worst possible outcome was they'd tell her "yes" to one of the above questions. She contacted her salesperson who told her the event was indeed on for this week, and she was invited. It seems the invitation was just sent to her place of employment, not addressed to her. Thus, she didn't receive it. So, for the price of asking, she got to attend an event she really enjoys. If she hadn't asked, she'd have missed out for no good reason. This is why I always say "You have not because you ask not". Generally the worst thing that can happen is someone tells you "no", leaving you in no worse shape than you were before.

Easter Treats

Last Sunday we celebrated Easter at my mom's house. My contributions were:

1. Blue Cheese Walnut Spread

This was a new recipe, and it was a hit.

2. Ghiradelli Carmel Turtle Brownies

 Yes, from a box, and they were fabulous.

Are you helping or hurting?

Suze Orman poses the following question to people who are or are thinking of assisting someone financially: "Are you helping or are you hurting?" I was reminded of the importance of this distinction by a story my coworker told me today.

Her husband's brother and the brother's girlfriend were arrested on drug charges yesterday. This came as no surprise to the family as they are both known addicts. My coworker also mentioned that the brother-in-law is 24 and has never worked. I asked how he bought the drugs. It seems he and the girlfriend live with his dad. The dad gives them money. They in turn use the money to buy drugs. They also sell/barter food from the house to support their habit.

When the cops searched the house, they found over 100 syringes, and of course no one had a valid medical reason for them. I'm not sure what other items of interest were located. One of the cops told my coworker's father-in-law "you aren't in any trouble, but you need to kick them out of your house." Yes, he does. Can you say "enabler" boys and girls? Yes, I know this is your child, but you aren't helping. You are allowing him to continue living a messed up lifestyle. It's time to cut him off. That will be helping him in the long run, though I'm sure it will hurt in the short term.

An expensive text

I saw this article linked from a discussion board. That is one expensive text. :)

Not work ready

I was in Kroger yesterday and noticed the following sign posted at the computer where people can apply for jobs at the store:

"When completing an application be sure to include a good phone number with a mailbox that is set-up and that is not full."

I wouldn't post this if I were them. People who doesn't know to do this are not work ready. Let them remove themselves from consideration right off the bat. It saves you, the potential employer, time.

It's official

I got my 6 month review yesterday. All positives across the board. I am now officially a permanent state government employee.

On a related note, today I ran into a coworker I hadn't seen since I left my last job. She told me "I tell people, I don't care what anyone says. (Blogger) ran this place." Nice to be missed. :)

C is for cookie

Those of you who are Sesame Street fans know the rest- "that's good enough for me." I do love cookies. I admit to being a bit of a cookie snob though. A lot of store bought cookies just don't do it for me. I find them to be a complete waste of calories. Now, a nice homemade cookie on the other hand...

A while back my neighbors had made of batch of chocolate peanut better chips cookie that were phenomenal. They told me they used the recipe found on the Hershey's peanut butter chip bag. I had been wanting to make them myself ever since then, and I finally did so this weekend.

Here's the finished product:

They were delicious and quick to make. This recipe definitely rates a repeat.

Sometimes we need the past to appreciate the present

This week marks 6 months at my new job. Amazing how time flies. I've written before about how remarkably easy this job is and how little actual work I do. I had predicted that at around 4 months I would be bored. I was right. I have been job hunting again, and I'm amazed at how much more response I'm seeing this time around. I've already had several phone and in person interviews. 

Me being me, though, I'm ready to move on now. Patience is not always my strongest suit. Last week I was feeling pretty frustrated that my new job wasn't in sight yet. That all changed when I ran across some paperwork from my last job. Oh my. I had put out of my mind of lot of the crazy with which I dealt daily. It made me realize again just how good this job has been. I've been practically skipping into work since then. Sometimes we need the past to help us appreciate the present.

Dillard's Deal

I have been looking for a winter dress coat for a year or so. I've always run into two problems.

1. They are quite expensive and hard to find on clearance.
2. Even the expensive ones are rarely wool, which is what I wanted.

Recently Dillard's had one of their "extra 40% of clearance" sales. Lo and behold, winter coats were included. Usually, that is the one exception. They actually had one in my size, and it was 80% merino wool.

The clincher? It was $39.69 after the 40% off, and it was originally priced at $189.

Of course, I scooped it right up and brought it home. Here's what I'll be styling next winter.

Your Work Matters

The sermon at church this weekend was on work. The speaker pointed out that what we do on our jobs has an impact on the lives of others. This was illustrated to me at my job this week.

Last Thursday a new customer came into our office. He had recently moved from out of state and was wanting to update his resume as part of his job search. In talking with him I found out he was a welder. This is an occupation in high demand in our area, so much so that we pay for people to become welders. I assured him there were lots of openings locally, and I gave him the contact information for a company that I know is often looking for welders. I also said that if he needed tools to start his job that our agency could help buy them.

The customer came into the office yesterday with good news. He has a job at the company I recommended with a nice hourly wage, and he's supposed to start tomorrow! He came back in today, and we did the paperwork to apply for funding for his tools. Our agency will be purchasing all the tools he needs, to the tune of around $600. There is no charge to him, and the tools are his to keep.

This is the first time at this job that I have directly helped someone get a job. It is a great feeling. I know the gentleman would have gotten a job on his own, but it was nice to help him get one so quickly and assist him with getting all the equipment he needed. Our jobs do indeed impact the lives of others. Whether that impact is positive or negative is up to us.

I Know Now What I Don't Want

Robin Wright said this after her divorce from Sean Penn. I've always liked this quote because I think it is important to know both what you do want and what does not work for you. Taken together they can help you make the best decisions. Here are some examples of things I don't want.

 

1. I don't want to work with the general public in my next job.

2. I don't want to treat people in a way I wouldn't want to be treated.

3. I don't want to have to work until I'm 80.

4. I don't want the important people in my life to ever doubt that I love them.

5. "I don't want to date anyone with less "stuff" than me"- former coworker. By this she meant someone with his own car, job, place to live, etc., not materialistic "stuff". She later violated her own rule and it set her back years financially. I've adopted this rule for myself.

6. I don't want to look back on my life and say "I wish I'd...".

7. I don't want to spend my time or money on things that aren't fulfilling.

 

Being honest with yourself about what you don't want is something we need to all do. 

Sometimes it's just that simple

The cigarette lighter in my Tracker has never worked since I've owned it. My brother looked at it some time ago and said it was too difficult to replace, so he'd wire a new one in for me sometime. Sunday he was looking at it again after he'd fixed my broken door handle. This time he took the additional step of removing the radio in addition to the trim, ashtray, and climate control panel. This greatly expanded his view of the cigarette lighter setup. He then said "Tell me it's not that easy." The lighter was unplugged. Sure enough, he connected the power back to it, and it worked. No idea why it was ever unplugged, but yep, it was that simple. 

Maybe it's a sign

The admin person at our main office has been out sick since sometime in January. She returned last week. I was visiting that office for a meeting on Friday, and I stopped by her desk to tell her how glad I was that she was back. She told me "I thought you quit. I thought someone had told me you got a better job. I must have dreamed it. Have you gotten any good job offers lately?'. I just sort of laughed. I hope it's a sign and that what she had was a vision about the very near future.

 

An unexpected gift

After reading my post on people different from me at work, you probably get that this job doesn't always fill me with hope about humanity. Last week I had an experience that reminded me all is not lost. I had previously worked with a wonderful customer. She did everything I asked, and in short order she landed a great job. Of course, the key to her success is that she did it.  I really just signed her up for classes. She has been so appreciative and said how helpful I've been. Naturally, this made me feel good. Well, it got even better. On Thursday the receptionist told me someone was there to see me. It turns about it was the customer's husband and son. They brought me a gift set from Bath & Bodyworks she bought me as a thank you gift! I was floored. This was unexpected and something I've never experienced. It was a very good day at work that day.

 

People different from us- part 2

@ my job

 

Oh my, where to start. I think my friend said it best. When he found out I'd be taking this job, he told his wife "This will be an eye opening experience for her." He was not wrong.

 

I work for the state agency that handles unemployment. Though that's not my specific function, I interact a lot with these customers. I have to remind myself that the customers we see are not a representative sample of unemployment recipients. Most people do all their claim filling online, and we never see or hear from them. Here are things I have observed based on the customers we do see.

 

1. Low education level

I have never met so many people who don't have a high school diploma or GED. Everyone I personally know has at least this education. I had no idea there was such a large population without this.

 

2. No driver's license

Who are all these people who don't have a driver's license? I've never seen this many state issued ID cards in my life. Everyone I know who is 16 or over has a driver's license. I just don't get it.

 

3. Lack of computer savvy

 

I realize that computer skills are something I take for granted. I assume most people can read a screen, follow the directions, and complete their task. I would be wrong. Our computer resources are completely self service. We are not allowed to do them for you. My coworker was recently telling someone to left click something. The customer picked up the mouse and pointed it at the screen. If you or someone you know needs to increase your computer skills, there are many options available. Many libraries have free classes, and there are websites you can use at no charge. This has made me very determined to keep my technology skills updated as time goes by.

 

4. PJ pants in public

 

This item is in honor of my former coworker. She detests PJ pants in public. I totally get it. Unfortunately, I see this so often, it's hardly noteworthy. If you are coming to our offices for services, I want to see you make some effort. We are a business, not your house. Have some pride in your appearance and put on your grown up clothes.

 

5. Smoking

 

No one in my family/social circle smokes. I am amazed at how of our customers do. The smell is sometimes so strong I can't be anywhere in the immediate area of the person.

 

This has indeed been a very enlightening job for me. It has made me clearly see that there are many people who are very different from me.